In my family I have Mom, and Dad (Erika, and Eric), an older brother Adam, and older sister, Lindsey.
Adam doesn't live with us at home. But, whenever he comes over I bark at him a lot until he plays with me and gives me treats. He might be the easiest person to get a treat from. Most people make do a trick. But, with Adam just barking will usually do it.
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Here is a picture of us hanging out together when I was little.
But, as much as I like Lindsey, she did one thing that I'm not entirely sure I can forgive her for yet.
Apparently, when Lindsey was living at her other house before I even was born, Lindsey had a friend that got something called a "cat". Cats are like dogs, but smaller, less fun, and with very sharp claws. So, Lindsey's friend got this cat which she named Gnarly. And boy, was that a good name choice. Turns out not all cats like people, and like attention. Strange!! So, Gnarly is one of these cats. Gnarly really doesn't like it if you touch it, talk to it, look at it, or try and play with it. Why do these things exist? Well anyway, Lindsey's friends didn't like having the "loner" cat, so she said she was going to just take it to the pound. But, Lindsey is one of these people that doesn't like to see any bad thing happen to anyone or anything... even a cat. Which... you know maybe if a bad thing was going to happen to something... having it happen to a cat wouldn't be so bad... But, no one asked me. So, Lindsey volunteered to keep the cat.
When Gnarly first came home I really loved her. I thought I had buddy to play with all of the time. But, no one in the house wanted us to play together. They kept us in different rooms. Oh, I could hear the cat, smell the cat, but I wasn't allowed near the cat. Not fair! It went that way for a whole summer. Then Lindsey went back to live at her other house, and she left the cat behind. So, Mom and Dad started letting Gnarly and I hang out together. At first whenever the cat saw me it would just run and hide. Which was great! Because that meant I could chase and bark. Then a couple of times. I actually caught it! And, I would start to play with it like I would a small dog at the bark park. But, Gnarly does not play fair!!! As soon as I would start trying to play she would start smacking me with her paws and they are SHARP! worse than any dog at the Bark Park.
Oh well, all things considered I guess it is more fun having the cat around than if it wasn't here. But, if they would have asked me, I would have suggested another dog.
3 comments:
Hahah Oh Gizmo!
Gizmo,
My name is Alley Cat. Supposedly, I "belong" to Sam and Shannon, but in reality, they belong to me. If you don't understand what I'm trying to say, I'm sure Gnarly can explain it to you. See, I know all about dogs. I have one at my house named Amelie, and she's a real idiot too, just like you. If my experiences with Amelie are any indication, then dogs are probably about the dumbest animals on the planet. You'll do stupid, degrading tricks just to get some nasty dog treats, and you'll do almost anything for some people food. But I know your favorite treat of all...and it says a lot about you. One time I told another dog I know, Frank, to eat crap. Guess what? He went straight to my litterbox, and he ate MY crap. He got in trouble for it, but he did it again later. I know I'm deliciously charming, but come on!
I could go on and on, but what I'm trying to say is that you have unfairly represented Gnarly. I'm sure every scratch you have endured has been well-deserved, because cats are notoriously well-balanced, fair, and judicious creatures. Dogs are notoriously...well, moronic. Gnarly is on the table because she CAN be. See, you only think that's a rule. Your parents didn't bust Gnarly because IT'S ONLY A RULE FOR YOU! Anyone else in the house can get on the counter or the table if they really want to...anyone except you. Sorry, the truth hurts. So quit getting up in Gnarly's bidniz, dog. And quit defaming cats on your daddy's blog. We've got ways to retaliate...and you don't want to find out what they are.
Later gator,
Alley Cat
Alley Cat,
That did hurt a little bit, a little bit. And, I've been in the litter box, I'm not saying I would do it every day, but you know if the door is open, and you want something a little different... I just don't see the problem, that is all I'm saying.
Are there any nice cats out there?
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